humour: October 2004 Archives

Better late than never


M'Lynn threw out the challenge. Here I go
Virtual Wife Swap

Inspired by the new addictive television show, our Friday focuses on what someone would find if Wife Swap came to your house!

1. What time do you wake up in the morning? What's your morning routine? Do you work outside the home?
On M, T, W, and F I wake up at 0545 at home, grown, get out of bed, get dressed,feed the cats, fix tea, and try to get out the door by 0650. Showering, feeding myself, any housework, dealing with the 16 y/0 or my dh are optional activities, to be handled if and when I have time or energy or can get myself moving. Th, I wake up at the hospital (that is if I have gotten any sleep - an enormously variable issue!) make rounds on my patients, report off, grab a travel mug of tea, and drive one hour home. Saturday if I work is the same as Wednesday and Sunday is like Thursday. If I am off that Saturday, I try to sleep.
If I manage to get up early enough, I will check email and/or anwer queries.

2. Who does the nasty jobs in the home? Do you clean the toilets (and how often) or do you foist it off on someone else? What about the dishes, the cooking, the shopping?

Anyone who is upset by the toilets is welcome to clean them. It is done on a need basis. Same for dishes, except that I like to see them done at least once in 24 hours - preferably before going to sleep at night. But not always by me. Cooking - if I am home, I cook. I am the best cook in the house, and I usually enjoy cooking. If I am not at home, dh is competent, so is 16 y/o dd. But they are more likely to eat the leftovers or go get Chinese than to cook a complete meal from scratch. Shopping - I usually go by the supermarket on my way home from work Thursday morning - I check out the cheap meat and buy bargains that go into the freezer for future use. Otherwise, we operate on the Pantry Principle - there is usually enough food at home to eat for weeks without shopping - except maybe liquid milk.

3. Be honest-- what's the state of your wardrobe? Will the visiting wife recoil in horror at your lack of clothing, look on impassively, or shudder at the copious amounts of cash you blew this season?
I have lots of clothes, many of them are years old but still in great shape and useful for work at home or in the office. I would still recommend bringing your own, though - I am an odd size and have stubborn tastes that many would find problematic.

4. How's your self-care? Are you an indolent pleasure seeker, a responsible caretaker of your body, or have you just let it all go?

See # 1 above. My self is not my highest priority - I take care of myself to the extent that I consider necessary, but not indulgently.

5. How's your parenting going? Do your kids walk all over you? Do you treat them like it's boot camp? Do you like it that way? Do they?
5 of 6 are out of the house, and the last one is almost there. She requires an inordinate amount of chauffering, though.

6. If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be? Be honest-- do you like it the way things are or are you silently seething? What's it going to take to make things better?
I'd like the house I'm in to get a makeover, and I'd like to live near my internet friends. I could stand to have an Anglican rite parish nearby, too!
About the house makeover - does anyone know a simple way to get paint off the bathroom tiles? Turns out that the last owners didn't like the colors and painted over with ordinary white house paint, and it is now peeling and chipping and looks like crap. And the cabinet fronts in the kitchen look like someone nailed wooden siding to the doors and then painted it white. I would gladly replace the seafoam green formica counters with a classic white (although granite would be ideal).
Oh, and a job that didn't have a one hour commute would be most excellent too!

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About this Archive

This page is a archive of entries in the humour category from October 2004.

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